This post is concerns the schism between two people; myself and Joseph Harwood, formally known, Joseph Lawrence, not to be confused with the brand trademark ‘Joseph Harwood’.
Joseph and I fell out because someone he knew heard me saying that I thought he was talented and driven. I then, as I always do, go on to say that Joe is under-recognised for his perseverance and manifest virtuosity and therefore it saddens me to say that he lies to my face, never mind the public, about his achievements and general life, all too frquently. Joe deserves more recognition for his work on youtube and he can go about getting that anyway he wishes, but lying to me constantly and making me look like an idiot in front of him for taking it in so gullibly, without interrogation, when we were friends, I found upsetting.
The person Joe knew at a club I was at ‘grassed me up’ on saying these things and Joe confronted me online about it. He wanted me to apologise for my ‘drunken spurtings’, but I actually said to him that I would not apologise for saying those things because I believe them to be true and after our long relationship I was tired of being lied to.
It is very difficult to talk to a friend when all they have to say is obviously bullshit… it’s boring because to connect with the conversation you are feeding the fire and the fiction continues to burn, until eventually all if left is the smog of mendacities and that is an uncomfortable atmosphere to be situated in. Furthermore, it makes your own ‘real’ expierences that you’d like to share seem pathetic and unworthy of mention. Also, you are being so humble to the person, because you are making yourself seem like a naive idiot, which I did for a long, long time, because I was too nice to question his claims and make him squirm. After all, I just wanted to go out and have some fun together. Our relationship was mostly exploring London-nightlife.
Some examples of the things Joseph would tell me included that he inherited six-figures, one night, just before we were headed into a club Shadow Lounge in London Soho. I didn’t ask if that was more like a hundred thousand pounds, or practically a million pounds sterling, because I knew this was fictitious and I just wanted to end fantasy conversations as soon as they arose, because I am a scientist. Science is a path to truth and truth is what is interesting to me, because it is real and I want to learn genuine things about the universe in which I inhabit. If I want a fantasy story I will read a book, or watch a film for they have substance that is inspiring and enjoyable to immerse yourself in and they do not claim to be non-fictional, unlike Joseph’s tales which were presented to me as actualities. If a friend of mine did inherit six-figures and it was believable, my reaction would have been something like.
“OMG! Wow! Darling, I am so, so pleased for you. *happy embrace* Of course, it’s sad that your distant uncle passed away, but you must be over the moon? Like, are we talking a hundred thousand pounds, or closer to a million!? OMG… *beaming with delight* What do you plan to do with the money!?”
I knew Joe in real life – he was not hugely rich for his age and the way he said it, his body language and prosody, as well as the fact he said “six-figures” (I mean come on… who would say such an ambiguous thing when conveying their good news?).
Other things he would tell me have included ‘earning hundreds of thousands of pounds as a child-model’ which he was now investing in his cosmetic brand. Now, don’t get me wrong, Joseph Harwood cosmetics is an owned trademark and is a brand. It is not, however, on sale, despite claims from Joseph that he would be releasing his brushes immanently about three and half years ago. I’ll be on the safe side and say three years ago. There has been no cosmetic Joseph Harwood products released commercially to date (30/04/2014). Only samples, which I have no idea about, frankly, but many claim are just obtained through sites like:
I am not claiming Joe uses this website at all, it has just been suggested to me and with the rest of the evidence, that he has offered to me: E.g. Joe has invested hundreds of thousands of pounds into the development of his brand and yet seen absolutely zero turn-over in year three because nothing is even available to buy… well, either there is some nonsense going on there, or his brand has been an awful business catastrophe to date.
Other more minor nonsense that I’d have to listen to when we were together was things like ‘being “SHOUTED and SCREAMED OUT” of a Rhinoplasty cosmetic consultation for having a nose that the receptionist deemed too perfect and so had some sort of extraordinarily unprofessional jealous rage.’ Now, unlike Joseph, I have had around 15-20 serious cosmetic consultations with surgeons and the odd one with a nurse, or patient co-ordinator. I have had 3 vocational, cosmetic procedures with general anaesthetic, I know what I’m talking about! I am fully aware of the set-up of these organisations and that would never have happened. The receptionist would hardly dare do something like that. She would be sacked immediately. Receptionists in these places are just there to give you your paperwork and alert your consultant that you are ready to go in when they are ready to receive you. They sit behind a desk taking phonecalls and reading emails and showing people to the toilet and waiting room. Anyway, I hopefully do not need to explain to you why that is utterly unbelievable, surely someone with the business aptitude of Joe would have gone to the papers about that and earned some more notoriety?
Anyway, this is just a tiny list of the kind of lies I put up with, looking like a gullible fool every time I met him. Why did I continue to hang out with Joseph? Frankly, because I am not insecure in my intelligence as I WAS OFFERED A PLACE AT TRINITY COLLEGE CAMBRIDGE on the condition that I achieve three ‘A’s at A-level. I actually took four A-levels and far exceeded their conditions, because I was also awarded ‘A*’s which are very difficult to achieve and I take my hat off to anyone who manages in any a-level subject, particularly Mathematics and any of the core sciences, which is where mine were. I am very comfortable with my intelligence so having to seem a fool was a sacrifice I could make, providing we got really smashed together and had a great time as we so often did!
These days Joseph has nothing to say about me except that I am exceedingly ugly and clinically insane because I accused him of being dishonest and repeatedly lacking veracity when speaking to me. Joe used to compliment my appearance before we fell out, but now he sees me as an enemy, he has back tracked and decided that my face is so awfully disfigured and repulsive that it resembles a “Picasso painting”. We could argue that he had always thought this, but just kept it to himself because we were friends and lied to make me feel better about my unsightly and hideous face. I doubt that though, I’m sure Joe has seen people who look worse than I do. I offer it to you that if I’m as unattractively revolting as Joe, these days, claims, he must truly be scared to go out, for the atrocious, monstrosities he must see in public all around him.
Now Joseph and I are no longer friends I maintain that I believe he has virtuosity in makeup application and creates some fantastic tutorials for Youtube. I do not suddenly believe he is repulsive… that would just be silly, wouldn’t it? I never thought his aesthetic was ghastly when we were friends, why would my opinion about the way he looks change so drastically just because we fell out? It wouldn’t of course, I am a realist. I see the world for what it is and I don’t resort to name-calling when I have a problem with them; I simply tell them what the problem is I have with them, nothing more. In the case of Joseph, I maintain that he is chronically dishonest; that is my issue and that is thus all I am going to say about him and if that reality offends him so much, then I also question the verisimilitudes of the things he publically ‘thinks’ about me. I suggest to you that he likely does not think I’m an ogre, he merely resents me for being perspicacious enough to know so much of what he says is fabricated and that I had the valour to tell him and anyone else who asks me for my honest opinion.
Why have I made this post? When Joseph and I fell out over the above, we made a pact to not talk about each other anymore. Joseph broke that pact by attempting to turn my friend Michael James against me with a very long winded letter along with quotes I had said about Michael in times of raging over his behaviour to someone who loved to listen. Of course, Joe very publically hated Michael James so he was always ready to hear my ranting and supplement it with this own empathy. Michael and I lived together for two years, the best two years of my life, there were highs and there were lows and Joe tried to use very outdated quotes to turn Michael against me, but not only that… to reunite in friendship with Michael who, publically Joseph detested more than anyone else in the world, it seemed. We never saw the end of snide video remarks and facebook statuses about what a despicable person Joseph believed Michael James to be; yet there he was seeking his hand in friendship in this letter which, as I said broke our promise not to speak ill ever again of each other.
I hope that makes everything very transparent for people who message me often asking “What really happened between you and Joseph Harwood?”
Synestra De Courcy